Delusional Moi

I live too much in my head.
How much of what I know is real, how much imagined, how much misinterpreted?
Do I want to know the truth? Can I handle the truth?
Can I survive the truth?

All questions to which I need answers - and unfortunately for me, required sooner rather than later.

I uploaded this clip to Youtube the other day - I'm sure it won't last long, but I think it shows exactly why living in your head is a bad thing - especially when it comes to thinking about woman you are attracted to.

By the way - this may not be safe for work. Parental discretion advised.

Conchords

This is why us kiwi guys score heaps eh bro.



We have such a choice way with words, it hurts sometimes. Plus it's not really fair on the Aussies eh. Awesome!

Acoustics Sets

I always used to think that if you stripped down an artist to their core essence, the the result would always speak volumes, either for or against them. I was beginning to think the same of people.



However, because life isn't always that cut and dried, I also heard the lead singer from Twisted Sister say something like how acoustic sets by rock bands proving their worth was a load of rubbish. "Take Tracey Chapman and put her in front of two Marshall stacks and an electric guitar - and see how well she rides the lightning", he said.

I have to agree with the man - and with that admission comes a lot of grey, in what I was rather hoping was a black and white world.

Turns out that I know less than nothing.

Laughing with me - right?

Saw this via a link on Ren's site.


There's something about this that rings true, and even more here.

Reading on between chuckles, I paused at this one entirely too long.



This is soooo not going to be my mantra for 2008. :)

A Very Civil Union

Bouncers are getting younger every day

You know? I'm starting to think of weddings the same way an immortal might think about funerals. Sure - the first few times are fun, but after a while the gloss goes, especially when you realize it's something you'll never get to participate in. As time goes on.... well, you get my drift; but I guess that's what you get for being everlasting.

This weekend SweetP and Army Girl got hitched. The second of my Auckland group of friends to follow their hearts into wedded bliss. Most of my Dunedin friends on the other hand, have long since wed, and are well into raising children by the score. Once again I seem to be left behind: it's not as cool as it once was.

It's not totally hopeless kiddies; I don't own any cat's or dog's - so perhaps that isn't to be my fate either :)
More importantly, the thought of living alone hasn't forced me into any panic; if there is a certain someone out there who can handle my particular brand of crazy, I'm prepared to wait; to say something suave, honest or sophisticated to get the girl. No second chance to make the same mistake again for this kid. If I dared to dally should the moment present itself, Bullrush Girl, Shars, or Keridopilus would surely kill me. Frankly I'd probably both deserve, and enjoy the prospect, especially if it meant missing another damn wedding. :)

So please, no comments for this post; because, although I am most likely immortal, I still hope for an outcome that awaits us all.

Temperature Check 3

Company - Rickie Lee Jones (1979)

If you don't love this, then we'll never bond at a musical level.
And I really would regret that; we've been through waaay too much.

Acceptance

I think its important to accept we can't fix every problem in the world. It's a guy thing to want to, I know; but sometimes in life, solutions to problems outside our sphere of influence can't be fixed no matter how hard we want to try (or rant for that matter). At times like this I guess we just have to have faith in those that can make a difference.


Tina Dico - Head Shop, from the Album "In the Red"

The city wakes the sirens call
To remind me why I don't remember
I'm kicking trash against the wall
Evening fades, still waiting to rise
No-one escapes undisguised

Whats with the Death Worship?

Ed's Dead Baby - Ed's Dead

OK, but for the life of me I don't understand the whole lets have a state funeral for the Sir Ed "thing". Sure - he was a great guy, and was first to climb a very high mountain. He also did a lot of good for others; but so do some many others out there. Seeing all those who stood on the footpath on the funeral route for a last glance at Sir Ed, the newspapers claimed that the last time this happened was when people lined the streets seeing off the soldiers for World War One. Frankly having someones death televised for public consumption made me a little ill, and even more turned off. Tune in next week for the next lucky recipient of the state funeral brought to you by "flamoral" soap, the soap you wouldn't be seen dead without.

Funerals are not a spectator sport. Sir Ed was supposedly a down to earth chap, who didn't enjoy a fuss; who didn't want a statue erected when he was gone. I can't help but wonder what he thought of all the pomp and circumstance.

Let those who knew him grieve him,
To those inspired, say goodbye,
To all others get a life.

Peace out.

Humid, you dont know humid!

If I don't get a good nights sleep tonight - I'm going to have to kill someone!

The last three days have seen temperatures over 30 degrees, which in itself isn't too bad; but coupled with 70 percent humidity, the result has been unbearable.

The store man at work proudly announces (to anyone who will listen), that he has had his air conditioner on for the last week not stop, enjoying the cool breeze as he slumbers: I think he may be first up against the wall when the revolution comes.

This summer has been unbelievably warm. Usually prior to Christmas, those of us that live in the lower parts of the South Island grind our teeth at the prospect of continual wet weather; weather that seems not to improve until at least mid January if not February. This year however, it has been glorious.

NFG has been enjoying the last week in a balmy Dunedin, and I'm glad that her memories of Dunedin this year will be of warm, albeit windy days. Unfortunately for her, she will soon have to deal with the reality of Auckland, with it's associated rain, heat and humidity; not to mention the traffic or the rushed pace of life. It is a sad life for those of us that opt in for careers and the cash, when we could have it all in Dunedin - except the careers and cash obviously.

Now, where did I park my other Ferrari?

A Delicate Sound of Thunder

Will it never end they ask.
Soon he said.

For Ren.

Mandolin Rain - Bruce Hornsby

Forgive my seemly never ending musical posts of late; I'm still in a holding pattern, my first week back here in Auckland. Blame it on the humidity and the power naps.

Cryptically - I'm trying to end something old, in the hope that it may somehow start something new; damning the consequences - once again the nose spites the face. :)

Eventually we all have a chance to risk a lifetime of inaction by action. Perhaps by taking a road never before traveled, an alternate ending may present itself.

Sorry about the video content - but this song is hard to find online :)

Think about her when I hear that whistle blow
I can't change my mind
I knew all the time that she'd go

But that's a choice I made long ago

Mandolin Rain - Bruce Hornsby

Little Wing

So I'm back in Auckland, and it's been real. The days are grinding through pretty slowly at the moment, and with NFG down in Dunedin this week I'm a little green with envy. If I win Lotto this weekend I'm heading south to catch up - if she wins she said she'd shout the flight. Looks like twice the normal chance of winning. :)

In the meantime I'm not in the mood for posting so until i do, have a listen to this version of Hendrix's "Little Wing" by Stevie Ray Vaughan. It's from the album "The Sky is Crying" - and is well worth a listen on a really good stereo. You can almost smell the atmosphere through the speakers.

Only the good die young. RIP SRV.

A-B Comparison

Cast you mind back to 1997. Billie Myers on the Radio singing "Kiss the Rain".



I brought the album, but as good as it was, I couldn't help but notice how much she sounded like Chrissie Hynde; so much so in fact, that half way through the album I would always stop and put in The Pretenders instead.



Never did hear the end of that album.

Brooke Fraser - C.S Lewis song

Incomplete but a taste of a lovely song. Enjoy :)

If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy,
I can only conclude that I was not made for here
If the flesh that i fight is at best only light and momentary,
Then of course I'll feel nude when to where I'm destined I'm compared

I fell in love

Photo credit

If Ford is to Chevrolet
What Dodge is to Chrysler
What Corn Flakes are to Post Toasties
What the clear blue sky is to the deep blue sea
What Hank Williams is to Neil Armstrong
Can you doubt we were made for each other

- Lyle Lovett

End of the Golden Summer

Around this time of the year I'm always reminded of the long trip home after the summer holidays. Just prior to Christmas we would pack up the Holden and travel to Westport to stay with my grandparents. Weeks later we would pack up and do the whole thing over again.


It took nine hours to get from Westport to Dunedin, not on interstate motorways but instead by roads built along the sides of mountain passes. In a country where air conditioning meant winding the window down more, and on roads that could be better thought of as secondary to pot holes, nine hours in a car was extreme torture to anyone, let alone a ten year old.

As a child I remember thinking that if I could just get to sleep, the trip would pass faster - all assuming you or your siblings didn't get car-sick along the way and set everyone else off. It was all in vein - someone always got sick, and usually after waking from a deep sleep.


The first part of the trip through the Buller Gorge was amazing, but as the family car hit the Canterbury plains the scenery slowly changed from green to brown and the hot "nor-westers" blew relentlessly through our windows, as we slowly baked under the midday sun.


After Christchurch we knew we were over half way, yet still had 4 hours to go. The roads south from now on were straight to the point of absurd. We couldn't wait until we hit the winding roads around Oamaru just to break the boredom. Sixty minutes from home we sat, eyes glued to the front windscreen, playing the age old game of "First to see Dunedin". No one cared who won, because thirty minutes later we would be home.

We always complained that the butter tasted funny after 9 weeks in the fridge, and the first dinner was limited to what what was in the pantry, because in the 70's there were no 24 hour supermarkets, and even the dairies closed in the early evening.
Behold New Zealand in the 70's - where all coffee was instant and milk was 5cents a pint. I know because I put the coin in the glass bottle we left for the milkman at the letterbox, sure in the knowledge we'd have a bottle of milk for our breakfast WeetBix the next day, unless (obviously) it was a Sunday. Because no one worked on a Sunday.

For better or worse, I think I miss that part the most.

The World according to George

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways ,but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember; spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

If you don't send this to at least 8 people....Who cares?

George Carlin

Matt the Magician

I've been wanting to do this for a while. Seeing it on the "Everything Changes" video clip (a couple of posts back) just cemented the whole idea. Matt gave me a photoshop lesson, while I provided the lump of clay.

I'm pretty stoked with the outcome, and I am planning to get it printed as a block canvas print.

Katie Rocks Out

I dusted off my Nikon today, and I'm really happy with the results.
I dont take that many photos these days - it's probably due to a lack of subject matter, as well as time.
All that said, I do love it when images like this happen.

Yep

This blog is all about you.
No - not you silly - the other person reading this
Yes - YOU. You know who you are.
Well most of the posts anyway.
The other posts are about someone else entirely
Trust me - would I lie to you? :)

Learn to be still

I had a nightmare last night. Well, in truth, probably just another bizarre dream rooted in substance; either way an unpleasant experience.

In this dream I am contemplating a return to retraining in my particular field of expertise. After looking at the work ahead, and my dead grandfathers notes on the subject matter, I realize that I am no longer interested in this path. I go to find my course supervisor to tell him I'm pulling out of the course, and to my surprise the classroom has now been turned into a Dance Academy. I wake depressed and confused.

So, on the face of it this is a simple "I've wasted my whole life" type of dream. At least in the dream I realize this, and am prepared to make a change in some way; a positive step one might say.

I think it's fair to say I'm driven, and therein lies the problem. I need to learn to be still. The sad thing, is that I realize this is not an uncommon occurrence. There are millions of people in the same predicament the world over, and no universal answer to be found.

NFG would say I should enjoy the now a little more, and she would be right. But when you've spent your whole life going from goal to goal, it's a hard beast to turn around on a whim. Still you have to try - don't you.

Never a Gem

Have you made someone smile today?
Just do it.
But look no farther than your own heart
To feel the joy it brings.

Guitar Hero Part 2

For every silly love song there's also a song about love gone bad.
When I first heard this song yesterday I was immediately reminded of the fact that relationships often don't last, and the worse thing you can do is prolong the inevitable. The trick is knowing when to go, or when to stay.
Before I continue in this vein and suddenly burst into the Gambler by Kenny Rogers, I'd like you take a listen to this live version of Slow Dancing in a Burning Room by John Mayer - better that than hear me sing :)

Everything Changes

This song has been running around in my head for a day now.
Hopefully posting it here will allow me to move on, at least musically.

First thoughts

We've reached an impasse, Alcohol and I.
She's a lot of fun, and gets me into a lot of fun situations. Although we don't always see eye to eye the next day, she's been around a long time, so we tolerate each other.
Hanging out was always fun in the past, but truthfully I don't drop by to visit much any more. Although I've changed over the years I notice she remains pretty much the same. The problem arises when I think I haven't changed - she bites viciously if you don't pay attention.
She brings me out of my skin; I'm usually more reserved. She makes me more honest than I should be, but frankly I don't care about that any more. Honesty is almost always a good thing.
Time to say goodbye for another year tho'. Enough time to remember the fun, yet still time to forget the consequences.
These are the best of times, after all.