Murder - Would you like Fries with That?

Happier times at Strathmore School

Welcome to New Zealand - can we kill you now or would you prefer it later?

In what seems to be a slide into the insanity that is the real world; New Zealand is slowly going nuts.
I read in David Farrar's Kiwiblog that someone was killed over a scrabble game. In the last few months we've had;
A body floating in an Auckland harbour stuffed inside a suitcase
A body found with no hands and a partially decapitated head (don't get me started on how a head can be partially decapitated !!!!)
A sixty plus teacher killed in her classroom whilst preparing a lesson plan.
Untold stabbings and attacks in South Auckland. South Aucklander's that don't know there is an Auckland Harbour bridge!
Two baby twins killed by unknown members of their own families.

The list goes on....

So come to New Zealand!
You can leave any idea of personal responsibility "on the hook" when you arrive - just make sure you pick it up on your way out of the country.
Your defense for any bad behaviour, including the odd killing or aggravated assault? - simply say it wasn't your fault.
You will be rewarded by a cuddle from the people in power, especially if you can blame anyone else.
Don't forget to lawyer up- if you're accused you can get this for free!
Also claim some cultural insensitivity, to allow you some time to get your story straight before talking to the Police.
You can also take some satisfaction in the fact that any of your victims relatives will get no satisfaction, assuming you get caught in the first place.

I wonder if you can make a noose out of Number 8 fencing wire?