Allison's Team is in the house

In my work life there have been few to admire; few to aspire to. In all my years of work there have only be two; both at Vodafone, and both, as it happens, women.

There's nothing sexist in that comment, it's just a fact. My boss is simply the best manager I've ever had, and possibly ever will have. Her ability to promote, lead, encourage, and perform simply blows us all out of the water - daily.

Under her watch we have become one of the best performing parts of the business - all men, all different backgrounds and personalities, we have one thing in common - we're in her team.

Or we were.

Like most people who are outstanding in their roles, they eventually move on. I always knew it would happen, but I figured we'd get at least three or four years before she was tapped on the shoulder. We got eighteen months.

None of us are taking it very well.

In our lives we've all had those moments of synergy, these rare slices of "great". We make mental snapshots of these moments. These specific memories often sustain us through the down times - especially when we need to remember that things will one day be good again.

Regardless her decision has been made. I'm reminded that change is the only universal constant, and I can only hope that something good will come from a situation that has come as a shock to us all.

This is going to take some getting over; and I'm definitely not alone in this.

Cant sleep

The truth is all that it can be
When it's sullied not, by you or me
We try our best to dance around
When all that's lost can yet be found.

No sex please - we're Vampires

I never saw the Twilight fascination.

I wondered exactly what ethical conundrum a one hundred and ten year old vampire would have dating a 17 year old girl.
Conversely wondering what a 17 year old girl would have in common with someone with a century of life experiences, I wonder how I get to sleep at night…..

"But the closer they get, the more Edward must struggle to resist the primal pull of her scent, which could send him into an uncontrollable frenzy. Somehow or other, they will have to manage their unmanageable love. But when unexpected visitors come to town and realize that there is a human among them Edward must fight to save Bella" - Summit Entertainment

OK - So it's a smell thing then.

The thought of a hundred year old scent induced horn-bag hitting a 17 year old high school senior aside, I am interested in the other taboo nature the franchise offers; that of her wish to be turned into a vampire.

The irony is that the Mormon Stephenie Meyer, who wrote this lucrative franchise equates becoming a vampire with sex. In order for Bella to become a vampire she must first marry her beloved yet strangely uber-controlling Edward.

So no sex before marriage then.

I guess it's a moral relationship after all....

Currently playing

I'm not a huge Hunters and Collectors Fan, but of late I've warmed to lead singer Mark Seymour's "daytime and dark" album. Stripped down songs that sing to me and my acoustic guitar. Music is a lovely thing to make, even if you're not good enough to be a professional as such.

Come on confess your confusion
Spread it around
They trickle down your cheeks tears fall
Like seed on barren ground
Your thoughts are scattered
Like paper everywhere
Tiny pieces of laughter and despair

Them

They say that you have to move on.
They like to say a lot of things.

But what if you can't? What if you wont?
Does that mean that you're forever stuck in a moment - that you wont progress?
I guess it depends.

I think they say to move on, because it's easy.
I think they say it, because they don't have the answers to the questions you want answered.

I say hold on, until you want to let go; however long it takes.
If it takes forever, so be it; it's your life to live.

Just don't ask for help, unless you're prepared to listen to what they have to say. :-)

Well that's sorted

I wish I could convey the feelings that come over me when I finally find something I've wanted for a long time. For me its like having a ten year old jigsaw puzzle with one bit missing, and finding the last piece in a cardboard box under a moldy old sock, while looking for something else entirely.

I'd like to think that all the bits I'm missing in my life will turn up sooner or later. I seem to have faith that things will sort themselves out in their own time, and when the smallest things do, I feel that the world is suddenly a better place for it happening.

Some days are better than others; some days it's hard to believe that these things or people will come through, but regardless the song remains the same.

Eight years ago I finally found the watch I love - the last watch I'll ever want or need. As far as the whole watch thing goes I'm sorted. The list slowly gets crossed off and the small gaps in my life get filled.

Niamh could not have known the significance of the amp she tramped back home for me. Twelve years in the making - I wouldn't accept it was here until I opened the package.
"You better make all the bloody right noises", she said, as I opened the box.

The strains of the story around the amps trek south were there to be heard - how she almost left it in Dubai, how she was screened by madmen security staff. White noise to my ears. Soon to be folklore, a story to be sure - she didn't realize that this amplifier was one more piece in the puzzle - a part in which she is now intrinsically linked forever.

God love her - if she wasn't already blissfully married I would have got down on one knee right there and then.

Amp: all sorted. Life - well, best not mentioned :)

Just wondering...

iTunes reports:
I'm listening to Taylor Swift, Mandy Moore, and My Chemical Romance (a lot).

Wondering:
Is there such a thing as tri-polar? :)

Decisions decisions

Sighted - a 'tween in a music store.
Forcing herself to decide between Justin Bieber and a Glee soundtrack.
Time stood still; her purchase in the balance.
I turned away smiling, thinking how great it would be
for life to be that simple again.

Come pick me up.

My bag rolled across the smooth bitumen that lined the airport long term car park. It was the sweetest sound; like a wave crashing on the shore. I hated when it ended; much like this song I stumbled on just five minutes ago.

When they call your name
Will you walk right up
With a smile on your face
Or will you cower in fear
In your favorite sweater
With an old love letter

I wish you would
I wish you would
Come pick me up
Take me out
Fuck me up
Steal my records
Screw all my friends
They're all full of shit
With a smile on your face
And then do it again
I wish you would

Playing the cards youre dealt

Putting the sad piano music aside, this is inspiring stuff.

We are what we think.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts we make the world. - Buddha

The golden opportunity you are seeking is in yourself.
It is not in your environment;
it is not in luck or chance,
or the help of others;
it is in yourself alone.

-Orison Swett Marden

Sia Furler

Loving this old song. Time to hit my Zero7 playlist again.



Would have preferred the official video, but no embedding allowed ...

Friends

I love my friends, but I love it most when the final reserve is gone. It can take years to break down those walls; those last bastions of self.

From fumbling first steps you never see the friendships that endure; if you could, I'd imagine the first meeting would be diabolically stressful.

It occurs to me that I met Angela when she was nearly the age her own daughter is now. I try to remember the small separate steps - this separated journey we have taken through our lives - to get to this point and place.

Today we fit; it hasn't always been this easy, this simple. Every year I feel more comfortable, which is silly to say as I have never been uncomfortable around her.

There were always moments, but as we sail through all this, we value each others strengths and weaknesses - this means so much more to me than a chance summer meeting could have ever done: we were both too young to appreciate this voyage ahead.

We both have our scars etched with sun, salt, and time - yet to me, they hold us true, and for that I could ask for no more.

Drugs

I've been feeling more than a little flat lately, and after a few nights of heading off to bed at 9pm, I suddenly dawned on me that heading off to bed three hours early may indicate something was up.

I realized that after all this trying to stay on the wagon, diet-wise, I may have inadvertently stopped eating red meat along with carbs.

Thinking iron might be the culprit, and not having enough sense to see a doctor, I decided instead to head off to the local heath food shop for some iron tablets.

I don't know what's behind the health industries fascination with Spirulina but to be honest I fear the stuff. In my experience anyone I've known who's taken it quickly moves on to St John's Wort, followed swiftly by madness. It's a cycle I've seen in more than a couple of ex flatmates...

Still, I hate the smell of iron tablets, so for now it's the subversive green tablets for me. Should I cir cum to the temptation of St John's Wort, I fully expect one of you to stage an intervention, before the inevitable transition to insanity.

Some of you who know me well, may argue that this may have already occurred, and to you I would simply smile and say "It might do well to stop thinking I'm a chicken - but frankly I'm saving a fortune on eggs".


And on that note I think I'll cluck off. :)